Sorry, can't help you there. I'm no practitioner of witchcraft, just a joe average trying to get by in the world these days. I do have a somewhat chequered past though and I did stuff to folks which I regret to this day. So I can sort of relate to what you're saying, the urge to feel the rush I felt when I was "on the job" and to live the "luxurious" life I used to live with my "friends" comes every now and again, but after recognising it for what it really is... I can control it much better these days.I've done some time for it, and I guess after many years of thinking about what I'd done. I'm sort of a changed man because of it. There's a price to pay for happiness achieved through the suffering of others. The money received by depriving others of their happiness, humanity and their lives somehow or other doesn't stay with you or last long. Money is just a tool for daily life, it is NOT a means to happiness, which is what we're all really after.I found that by depriving others of their happiness, I became more and more miserable myself. The booze and the drugs I thought were helping me back then were just f**cking me up more and more. But I just couldn't stop living the life, I knew what was happening and that it was all coming a dead end. It's not that I didn't know the consequences or the misery I felt, or the meaningless, wicked life I had chosen... I simply didn't WANT to change. The demons, the real ones which will really destroy us, they're not out there, they're all inside us.