Author Topic: a poem... i need to know what you think!!  (Read 2110 times)

lovenrock243
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a poem... i need to know what you think!!
« on: April 05, 2005, 06:52:31 PM »
old weeping willow
old weeping willow , i so wish to know
what have you seen and what are your woes?

as i sit lounging in your shade, under you callous moist tears
i wounder whats happened i wonder you fears.
why must you weep and what must you know.
old weeping willow i must not go.

your leaves are all broken and torn
your eyes tired, and your face looking forlorn.
your bark broken from many hard blows.
you have sat on the rivers edge, always with a light glow.
now i have seen why you  weep now what do you know?

you were once the king among the trees ,in glory regiened
your tears were once smiles filled with happines , and glee
old weeping willow why full of all these fears?
what happened to hope , is now diseased tears.

storms of experiance gave your bark all its warn cracks,
time you cutter, your new red ax.
burning fires with strong winds , hard earth, and pouring rains.
i pitty your soul, i feel your pain.

dear old will i have came to see, as i recline
your pain and disease is covered from simple eyes like mine
you have fought to live throught feirce winds , and freezing cold snows.
i have came to see why you weep, and know what you know.


o0o and plz dop not copy for i am sending this into a big contest
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Voo
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a poem... i need to know what you think!!
« Reply #1 on: April 05, 2005, 07:53:53 PM »
It's a good poem but has many errors in it. I could edit it and retype it for you if you like. but I wouldn't do it if it would hurt your feelings. Let me know. Voo

lovenrock243
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a poem... i need to know what you think!!
« Reply #2 on: April 06, 2005, 01:28:07 PM »
yeah that would be nice :D
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sybon?
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a poem... i need to know what you think!!
« Reply #3 on: April 06, 2005, 08:01:48 PM »


nice!!  :wink:

lovenrock243
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a poem... i need to know what you think!!
« Reply #4 on: April 07, 2005, 01:39:41 PM »
lol
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lovenrock243
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a poem... i need to know what you think!!
« Reply #5 on: April 14, 2005, 03:17:06 PM »
none does this thing anymore, i haven't seen someone post something new in along time
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Light17
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a poem... i need to know what you think!!
« Reply #6 on: April 19, 2005, 08:00:39 PM »
I like it because it rhymes. NOT like some other poems!  :wink: