Monstrous

MonsterVision => Modern Horror => Topic started by: Nina on January 15, 2009, 01:47:13 AM

Title: You Know You're a Horror Movie Geek if You:
Post by: Nina on January 15, 2009, 01:47:13 AM
You Know You're a Horror Movie Geek if You:

   
- believe the gore the merrier.

- have ever been mistaken for a Satanist.

- root for the mutant family in "The Hills Have Eyes."

- laugh during "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre."

- cry while watching "It's Alive."

- believe Rob Zombie is a great director.

- prefer slow, shambling zombies over the fast ones.

- hate CGI.

- refer to classic films as the original so people don't think you're talking about the remake.

- detest the rating "PG-13."

- have seen any of the movies Peter Jackson directed before "Lord of the Rings."

- hope that Steven Spielberg stops with the Oscar contenders and returns to stuff like "Jaws."

- die inside every time another remake is announced.

- can't get enough of "The Stuff."

- go out of your way to watch anything that might have Bruce Campbell in it.

- see any movie based on Stephen King even though you know it's going to suck.

- drooled when "Masters of Horror" was announced.

- argue that Tobe Hooper, not Steven Spielberg, directed "Poltergeist."

- have seen Christopher Lee in a drag.

- watch "From Dusk till Dawn" for Tom Savini instead of George Clooney.

- try to get people to admit that "The Silence of the Lambs" and "Seven" are horror flicks.

- randomly say "BRAINS!"

- get pissed when all channels play Christmas movies instead of scary movies on Halloween.

- believe that "Van Helsing" ruined the classic monsters.

- ever yelled for any reason at the screen "Just Kill that lady!"

- think baby Selwyn is cute.

- know that "28 Days Later" was not the first movie to have running zombies.

- want your enemies' heads to pop like in "Scanners."

- wanted Bill Moseley to get an Oscar nomination for playing Otis in "The Devil's Rejects."

- threaten to suck people's brains dry.

- can explain Chucky's (of the Rugrats) fear of the guy on the oatmeal box.

- know that Chucky's (the doll) real name is Charles Lee Ray.

- import dvd's from Japan.

- read Fangoria.

- hope the makers "Alien vs. Predator" burn in hell for ruining two of your favorite monsters in one movie.

- warn people about hardshell peppercorns.

- know all the slashers and their backstories.

- refer to shotguns as "boomsticks."

- ever wanted to cut off your hand and replace it with a chainsaw

- expand your horizons by watching a David Cronenberg movie.

- have read "The Zombie Survival Guide" and know what to do if the undead should rise.

- run out of the room if someone starts saying Candyman into the mirror.

- believe all the rich people in the world are really aliens that you can only see when you wear special sunglasses.

- can actually understand the plot of "Phantasm."

- know that "Prince of Darkness" beat out "The Davinci Code."

- warn real estate developers about building on Indian burial ground.

- wonder why George Romero couldn't have directed "Resident Evil" the movie.

- are aware that "Re-Animator" provided the world's first visual pun.

- are on the lookout for penis Miller in a Joe Dante movie.

- know that Klopek is not a Slavic name.

- realize that a tire is not a good hiding spot from a graboid.

- pay to get in and pray to get out.

- will always remember Johnny Depp as the guy who was vomited up in a geyser of guts by Freddy Kruger.

- made nitrous oxide your drug of choice after watching "Blue Velvet."

- have either "The Dead Zone" or "Sleepy Hollow" as your favorite Cristopher Walken movie.

- still can't accept that James Cameron directed "Titanic."

- are aware "The Exorcist" has sequels and not just prequels.

- heard of "I am Legend" before it was a Will Smith movie.

- know what KNB stands for.

- have the right to remain silent... forever.

- must resist the urge to introduce yourself with "Name's Ash. Housewares."

- stick to explored caves because of "The Descent."

- appreciate life so as not to get kidnapped by Jigsaw.

-ever had people look at you funny when you tell them what your favorite movies are.

-debate bipedal versus four-legged werewolves.

-ever asked for a Nixon pardon.

-hope for a zombie apocalypse so you can use what you learned from "The Zombie Survival Guide."

-can explain all the rules of all the vampire movies you've ever seen.

-believe Bruce Campbell does Elvis better than Elvis.

-get angry when someone says they don't like scary movies, but they go see one when everyone's talking about it.

-fondly remember the Video Nasties.

-believe Mary Whitehouse was a cross between Sarah Palin and the "Where's the Beef?" lady.

-lecture people about why the infected from "28 Days Later" are not zombies.

- don't require any assistance understanding the above.
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Title: Re: You Know You're a Horror Movie Geek if You:
Post by: Demon_Detective_Leo on March 21, 2010, 01:29:28 AM
Sequel to what you said?
Title: Re: You Know You're a Horror Movie Geek if You:
Post by: shenanigoat on June 22, 2010, 04:37:42 PM
Couple of points.

Can my fave Peter Jackson movie before Lord of the (gags) Rings be Meet the Feebles.

I do love the runners as opposed to the slouchers when it comes to zombies. I have had horrible nightmares about zombies and theyu always run.

I love CGI when used right.

Other than that great list.

A few I would add is:

Refuse to see quarantine as it seems pointless unless you are illiterate.

Hate that now a vampire movie is almost exclusivly targeted at the same audiences that watch soap operas.

Think that Dead Set might possibly be the greatest T.V. show ever.
Title: Re: You Know You're a Horror Movie Geek if You:
Post by: rave phillaphia on June 23, 2010, 11:44:28 AM
lol alright so I am a horror movie geek. So what? At least I know what will happen when bad horrible things start coming around lol.
Title: Re: You Know You're a Horror Movie Geek if You:
Post by: LadyLycanthrope on July 02, 2010, 07:31:42 PM
You know you're a horror movie geek if you've seen the same horror movie 20 times and still yell at the girl that the monster is right behind her or do a face palm when the people go into dark woods, rooms, any dark place in general.