Monstrous
Monstrous Music & Games => RPGs and Gaming => Topic started by: Regina Terra on October 08, 2008, 05:51:04 PM
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Hello & welcome, freaks & monsters. This is a new & interesting show called, "Your Momma!!!"
I, Regina Terra as the mod for this board, shall be your referee for this season. All of you ladies & not so gentlemen *winks at a blood covered werewolf in the audience* can come on up on to the stage & try to out do the previous contender!!!
The rules are simple, try to out do the last person to give a You Momma joke. Keep it clean & PG 13. No direct insult to any of the other participants. & no repeating any specific jokes, elaborations are allowed as long as it is not just a re-wording of something else.
Now, to get it started!!! Your Momma is sooo fat, she bought a green dress, & all the Japanese tourists ran screaming, "Gozira!!!"
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please regina.....you don't even have a mom....
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Lol, yes I do!!! Now come have fun with these silly jokes.
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no thanks. this isn't for me...
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your mommas so fat she wore a red dress and made the sun jealous
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Any other takers? No? Alright, Your Momma is sooo fat, when she its around the house, she sits AROUND the house. *<:)
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your momma's so fat that SHE BECAME THE HOUSE HERSELF!!!! (damn i suck at this)
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No takers? Very well, you're Momma is sooo stupid, she thought her Cheerios were trying to talk to her "Oooooooo" *<:)
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(http://i152.photobucket.com/albums/s177/combat_barbie/ratedE.jpg)
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What the? *<:)
Lemme try!
Yo momma's so old. she knew Ben Franklin back when he was just a penny.
(nerfed myself)
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Haha ok your mom is sooo fat, she jumped in the air and got stuck.
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I'm in!
Your momma's so stupid she tried to put M&M's in alphabetical order!
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Your mom is sooo fat she fell in love and broke it.
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Well, now it's time to show you kiddies how it's done.
"Your momma's so fat... her high school picture is an aerial shot!"
"Your momma's so fat... her tampons come out with Crisco on them!"
"Your momma's so dirty... even bedbugs won't bite her!"
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Your momma's so fat when she goes to a restaurant she looks at the menu and says "ok"
Your momma's so dumb she sits on the TV and watches the couch
Your momma's so fat she has to pull down her pants to get into her pockets
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Your momma's so smelly, a dog thought she was poo & tried to eat her. *<:)
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I used to have a dog that did that. No matter what we did, she wouldn't stop! Gross!
Your momma's so fat she has three shirt sizes: jumbo, humongous and "OH MY GOD IT'S COMING TOWARD US"!
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your momma so ugly she looked in the mirror and her reflection ducked.
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Your momma sooo stupid, she when someone said "duck!!!" she asked, "Is it cooked?"
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your moms sooo stupid she went to the superbowl with spoons
your mom is sooo stupid she got locked in publix and she starved.
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Yo Momma's so poor when I stepped on a lit cigarrette in your house she yelled "who turned of the heat"!
:-D
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Your mom is so poor I steped in her front door and fell out the back window.
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Your momma's so fat the back of her neck looks like a pack of hotdogs!
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Now then, at least some of you are seeing how it should be done. Though in my opinion, aside from mine, the only other person with Grade 'A' material is Kadesh, and she only posted once.
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Your mamas so fat she cant even float in space
Yo momma is so fat she sat on walmart and lowered the prices.
Your Momma's so fat she can go on vacation by rolling over.
You momma so fat one time she threw up and out came pinnichio
Yo mama is so fat when she turns around its her birthday again
Yo mamma's so fat when she went to Tokyo everyone said its GODZILA!
Yo momma is so fat, she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook.
Your momma is so fat the elephant on her shirt is real!
Your momma is so fat when she stepped on a scale it said 1 person at a time please
Your mommas so fat she pooped out an actionfigure.
Yo Momma so fat she tripped over Wal-Mart and landed on Target
Yo mama so fat that when she walkes she shows up on the rictor scale.
Most of those I got from Lili.
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Now then, at least some of you are seeing how it should be done. Though in my opinion, aside from mine, the only other person with Grade 'A' material is Kadesh, and she only posted once.
Does anyone else here want to start a "yo moloch" thread?
:lol:*
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I only have one request if you do - DO IT RIGHT! Don't make half-assed comments, make them awesomely beautiful in cruelty, and crushingly creative.
If you can't bring an A - game, then don't come at me at all.
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Your momma is sooo fat that when she jumped in the ocean to go swimming, all the whales sprang up & started singing, "We are family..."
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Yo Moloch so ugly instead of putting the bungee cord around his ankle, they put it around his neck :wink:
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Ok here is one Lili made up even though she thinks moloch is cool.
ok
Moloch is sooooo ugly he looked in the Mirror and the reflection ducked.
He got in the tub and the water jumped out...
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Now then, at least some of you are seeing how it should be done. Though in my opinion, aside from mine, the only other person with Grade 'A' material is Kadesh, and she only posted once.
Hows this MoMo
Your Momma is soooo fat
She makes Orca look like a Tic Tac
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Ok here is one Lili made up even though she thinks moloch is cool.
ok
Moloch is sooooo ugly he looked in the Mirror and the reflection ducked.
He got in the tub and the water jumped out...
damn these are good ones. i know. let's just mock moloch instead. it's only once in a while that we get to insult a god
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NO, that is against the rules. :police:
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What to mock a god...no its not.
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No, that is insulting, & we don't insult other members.
Since Moloch agreed, you can make Your Momma jokes about him, but openly insulting other members is not allowed.
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Yes, I agree to allow the little ones to mock me... so long as they remember that I am a vengeful God... and my retaliation, while not necessarily swift, will be brutal. <^>
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Again....*sticks his tongue at the so called god*
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*Changes the Terror's tongue into a slimy maggot.* There, now you can really wiggle it at me, can't you.
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Hahaha. MMMMM taste good.
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And now that you've eaten your own tongue... you can't talk. Now sit down, shut up, and learn how to do these things with class, pugnaciousness, and a whole lot of horror.
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HAhaha. Go ahead and make one up.
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Oh no! The big bad man is threatening us! Whatever shall we do? :-o
Wait! I have an idea! How's about we continue annoying him until that bulgey little vein in his forehead pops?
:evil:
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Hahahaha. Nah let him say a yo momma joke.
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Your Momma is like a Twinkie; she's been filled up with too much cream.
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Heared it.
Lili's walmart one is better.
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Your Momma is like Pamela Anderson - only grotesquely fat and ugly.
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Getting better but not better than her.
I do have to say though that it was better then I could have come up with.
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I didn't ask your opinion, in fact, your opinion matters as little to me as mine does to you. The point of this thread was to have fun. Now, by all means, if you think yours are better, try your hand.
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Um sir I didnt say mines was better, In fact I said yours was.....And your opinion does matter to me. Now just have fun.
Ok my turn (and this mine not Lili's)
Your mom is sooo fat she went around the corner in hight heels and came back in flipflops.
See I suck. So sorry if I ofended you Moloch I was trying to motivate you.
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No need to apologize, language barriers and other things can interfere with speech, not to mention that sarcasm doesn't carry well in type. Besides, that one wasn't half bad.
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Really? Thank you.
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You're Momma is sooo stupid that she says, "My Momma always called me special, but I could never figure out who she was calling Ed."
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*<:) Now that is what I've been wanting to see!
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It's a modified Special Ed joke my younger sis made up, lol, have to give credit where it's due. *<:)
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Hahaha yes that was good.
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Yes, I agree to allow the little ones to mock me... so long as they remember that I am a vengeful God... and my retaliation, while not necessarily swift, will be brutal. <^>
Go MoMo
Since I know what he does for a living, I have no doubt his retaliation will be BRUTAL :roll:
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Lol, cool. I'm in a sadistic mood, let us see him squash the kids. :evil: *<:)
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Girl I'm older than you and it seems your calling me a kid :laugh:
I think you mean the unexpeirenced (and I know that is spelled wrong).
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If you're a kid, then you're a kid. Chronological years mean nothing. :-)
:focus: Your momma is sooo ugly, that an ogre looked at her and ran screaming.
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Ouch...Knowing your mom I'd have to say....AWWWWWW poor ogre. *<:)
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Your Momma's so ugly that people mistake her for a living Monet painting.
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OUCH!!! That's freaking awesome Moloch. xD
Your momma is sooo ugly, dogs refuse to hump her legs when they are horny.
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Your Momma's so fat that she sweats Crisco.
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Let me throw some more in
Yo mama's so fat, when she wore a shirt with an AA on it, people thought it was American Airlines biggest jet
Or
Yo mama's so stupid, she had Dan Quayle check her spelling
And last
Yo mama's so ugly, her shadow quit
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Your momma's so fat. she ate the Pillsbury dough boy (damned cannibal!)
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Your Momma's so stupid, she mistook the afterbirth for the baby and kept you instead.
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Yo momma is a breed of weak seed.
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Yo momma is a breed of weak seed.
*blink*blink*
Ummm, yeah. Where's the dude with the hook to pull folks off the stage?
Your Momma's so fat that when people slap her thigh, it becomes a perpetual motion machine.
Your Momma's so stupid that her IQ violates the laws of physics.
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Yo momma's so stupid even George Bush says "Daaaammmmnnnnnn!"
Yo momma's so fat she sat on a rainbow and made skittles.
Yo momma's so hairy that when you were born you came out with 3rd degree rug burns.
Yo momma's so hairy her second language is Wooki.
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OMG you just stole/borrowed that from meet the spartans!
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I wouldn't know. I've never watched that movie, raz.
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Isn't that your momma is so hairy the ONLY language she speaks is wooki?
Because I saw the movie to and i'm not sure if it was second language or the only one.
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Your Momma's so stupid she makes Corky look like a genius.
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Yo mama's so fat, her car is made of spandex
Yo Mama's so fat when she bends over, it looks like two pigs fighting over a milk dud
Yo mama's so fat, she wears a hula-hoop for a belly-button ring
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Your momma is sooo fat, she stood up and eclipsed the sun.
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Your Momma's so fat, she caused the big bang by farting.
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hmmmm. . . let me try, though I've never been good at these. . .
yo momma's so big she can be seen from space.
all yo momma's are so big and so ugly the last time they got together people thought mount rushmore moved.
yo momma's so hairy the circus gotta shave her before she goes on as the bearded lady.
hey did you know the moon stopped orbiting the earth? Yeah, now it's orbiting yo momma.
yo momma's so hairy the last time she went camping bigfoot proposed!
yo momma's so fat she has homeless people using her flaps for blankets.
yo momma's so fat the last time she tried sunbathing everybody thought a whale had beached.
I'm sure at least some of those have been told before but they're all original as far as I know, heh, I'm particularily proud of the mount rushmore one.
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When the scientists first theorized the concept of the big crunch........... Yeah. They probably saw yo momma attack a twinkie :-D (rip off moloch's post)
And yeah.... she's THAT OLD.
(Phailed b'cause of too many wurdz!)
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yo momma is so stupid she got hit by a parked car
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"Yo momma's so stupid she said a lunar eclipse was made by Mitsubishi."
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yo momma so stupid, her birth certificate was a apoligy letter to common industries
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yo momma so stupid she was alking down the street talking to an envelope.
when i asked her what she was doing she said "im sending a voice mail"
%*)
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Yo mama so nasty she has to creep up on bathwater.
Yo mama so greasy Texaco buys Oil from her.
Yo mama so poor her face is on the front of a foodstamp.
Yo mama so stupid you have to dig for her IQ!
Yo mama so fat she had to go to Sea World to get baptized.
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yo mama so stupid she did a moon dance for the sun :gun:
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Your Momma is so poor I open the cabinet and the roaches sang "We are family!", Your Momma said "close it don't let the food out."
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Your Momma is so big she used the Grand canyon as a la tren.
Oh stinky river now!
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Yo mama so fat she influences the tides.
Yo momma's so fat, the USAF uses her for a "Super Bunker Buster" bomb, (and then there was SHOCKwaves and AWE)!
Very nice :lol:
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Yo momma's so fat, the USAF uses her for a "Super Bunker Buster" bomb, (and then there was SHOCKwaves and AWE)!
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Yo mama is so fat the birds made a nest in her ears.
They had to move soon because it only took 11 seconds to finish eating her brains.
(or exleast what was left of it.)
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yo momma so stupid she got hit by a parked car chasing a dead cat
your momma so nasty she gets more rides than the freeway
yall mommas so nasty we had phone sex and i got a cavity
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Im 10 and im gonna show you how its done.
Yo mama has had more black people than federal county prison
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Im 10 and im gonna show you how its done.
Yo mama has had more black people than federal county prison
Perhaps this would be more inspirational: Yo' momma's got butt crack is bigger than the Grand Canyon...
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Im 10 and im gonna show you how its done.
Yo mama has had more black people than federal county prison
I find it quite saddening that someone half my age would be able to say something so nasty about someones momma.
what inspired you to say sumthin like that? the fact taht you have to take a number an stand in line wit a bunch o smelly shlongs to see yo own momma?
__________________________________________________________________________
<don't take this personally or anything despite the obviously personal nature of this post. We're all mature bastards here. ^_^ >
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yo mama is so poor i hid her food stamps under her job application and she starved.
0:)
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Yo momma is so shallow, when you were born the doctor took an ice cream scooper and you popped right out.
(NEED PRACTICE. Please keep posting. my "yo momma" jokes suck horribly")
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Yo momma is so shallow, when you were born the doctor took an ice cream scooper and you popped right out.
(NEED PRACTICE. Please keep posting. my "yo momma" jokes suck horribly")
"Yo momma's so fat, when you were being born the doctor led you out by shouting, "Come to the light!".
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Yo momma so ugly that when she was used as a substitute for hazing!
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your mommassuch a whore she sucked so much a vacuum cleaner backed up and said wow
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0_0......... wow.
Yo momma such a slut, she's got bread on her yeast infection!
(wonder if that's any better. please rate)
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Your Mommas so fat, she had to go to a truck stop to be weighed.
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0_0......... wow.
Yo momma such a slut, she's got bread on her yeast infection!
(wonder if that's any better. please rate)
Much better; I actually feel sorry for the bread. It must be sourdough by now. *<:)
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Thnx. I'm really bad with jokes and stuff. wonder if i can pull summore off.
Yo momma's ugly somethin fierce! She walked up to yo papa one night and he sprayed her with his drink an said she looked much better. :police:
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yo momma's so poor that when she ordered a pizza you all had to go outside and eat it *<:)
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sorry my computer is being weird it's suppose to be a large pizza at that!
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Your Mommas so nasty a zombie wouldn't touch her
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yo mama so ugly she went to a night club and everyone started singing the freaks come out at night the freaks come out at night
yo mama so fat she sat on the toilet and it said a-b-c-d-e-f-g get yo fat ass off of me
yo mama so fat she stepped on a scale it said one at a time please
yo mama so fat she stepped on a scale and it said to be continued
yo mama so ugly she looked in the mirror and her reflection ducked
yo mama such a slut that she cums so hard we call her old faithfull
:-) thats how its done
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yo mama so stupid she walked into walgreens and said WOW THE WALLS REALLY ARE GREEN..
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You're momma's so fat she has to pull her ass up to wipe it. :police:
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Your momma's so hairy she makes Bigfoot jealous.
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Your momma's so fat she eats the McDonald's paper bag and all.
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Your momma's so fat the even the bearded lady said DAMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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Your momma's so fat the even the bearded lady said DAMMMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The fat lady's singing .
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Yo mamma so poor she can't even afford to pay attention.
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Your momma's so fat that when she puts on a pair of BVD underwear they spell out Boulevard! [This one was from my wife.]
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Yo momma so fat she's got more chins than a Hong Kong phone book.
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Boulevard?!? lol
now thats one big hell of an ass...boulevard :lol:
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true that lol
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You know who i pucked last night?............. Yo momma!
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Pucked? As in 'hit with a hockey puck'?? Or do you mean Puck the half goat half man?
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OMG! This image i didnt need :roll:
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Pucked? As in 'hit with a hockey puck'?? Or do you mean Puck the half goat half man?
What if it's Puck using a puck in a creative and vulgar manner; say as a butt plug?
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Satyriasis.................. :wink:
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Pucked? As in 'hit with a hockey puck'?? Or do you mean Puck the half goat half man?
What if it's Puck using a puck in a creative and vulgar manner; say as a butt plug?
You said 'butt plug' *<:)
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Yo' momma's so fat, she stood up and blocked out the Universe!
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Yo Mama.. Wait that's all I need to say.
I am horrible at these jokes, but for some reason I thought I'd try.
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Who was that you took home from the strip club?
.......Yo mamma!
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Your momma's so stupid, they use her name as an insult to denote how stupid she is.
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Your mama is so old I told her to act her age and she died.
I should just stop trying.. really I should...
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Yo momma so dumb, she....................... Yeah, I got nothing..... *<:)
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Lol that's better than what I had... lol
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Ha! I don't think anything beats "fat fingering my qwerty keyboard" *<:) *<:)
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LMAO! :D Well it's tiny and I type fast, so I always have to go back and correct it... >_< damn tiny qwerty's! It would be awesome if I could say my txt and it would register what I was saying and *poof!* off it goes :p
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My phone will read them to me, but I'm not sure I can speak them.... but I'm going to find out!!!! :spy:
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Lol, that would be awesome!
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Wait............. where the HELL is my phone!!?!?!?!
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ummm.... I'd answer that but you'd probably smack me through the monitor *<:) **looks in the couch** nope not in mine :D
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Oddly enough, It was under my arse. *<:)
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lol nice!!! Better than being in my couch... Then it would be under my dad's arse....
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I really need to learn to read. I just read that as "better than being in my crotch". Oops!! *<:)
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Oddly enough, It was under my arse. *<:)
Two questions:
1) Was it set to vibrate?
2) Were you aiming for your butt, or did you miss your first target?
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It's always on vibrate, baby! :evil:
And I wasn't aiming for anything... I just sort of lost it. :-P
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Hitachi Magic Wand. Yo Momma.
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Uhm... what? :?
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:-D Not another word.
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Y'all stop feeding Raz those paint chips.
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Shut up, Mo! I told him they were chips of mint chocolate. :-P
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I said they were potato chips.... It looked like fun, and Kadesh was laughing so hard, I had to try it.
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It's always on vibrate, baby! :evil:
Like all your "Fans" right?
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If the fan vibrated, it'd fall off my Armoire. And probably break a few things on the way down. It's an old fan, and kinda heavy.
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yaaaaa!!!! hitachi
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It seems strange that a guy would get my reference........(backs away slowly from levin)
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No I got it, I just chose to not reply to it :p. I am pretty sure a few others got it as well and decided to not respond. lol :p It's funny the one person who did though was a guy.
Yo mamma so stupid she put paper on the television and called it paper view.
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Yo momma likes Razzy.
HA! *<:)
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Yo momma likes Razzy.
HA! *<:)
I got nothin'.
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I have been owned :) **bows**
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*<:) *<:) *<:) *<:) *<:) *<:) *<:) *<:)
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But does razzy like yo momma? (NOt in THAT way apparently)
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Not if he keeps reading that poem..... :roll:
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Wait, wait, I just thought of one that may be better, but only for the old-timers:
"Yo momma's just like Regina Terra"
*Knocks on wooden desk furiously with both hands*
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Wait, wait, I just thought of one that may be better, but only for the old-timers:
"Yo momma's just like Regina Terra"
*Knocks on wooden desk furiously with both hands*
You just had to didn't you.
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Aww.... well that was just mean. I mean c'mon. Is ANYone really that bad??
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Yo mamma's just like Lindsay Lohan... that is how you spell it right?
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Actually, we spell it "skank". :wink:
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Lol, nice! oh I can't stop laughing.. lol
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Wait, wait, I just thought of one that may be better, but only for the old-timers:
"Yo momma's just like Regina Terra"
*Knocks on wooden desk furiously with both hands*
You just had to didn't you.
I knocked on wood afterward! Jebus, you would think you folks didn't trust me or something....
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I don't know who that that is, but I'm going to go look it up... hmmmm...
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If you look it up and read the posts, it's going to lower your IQ.... just warning you.
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I haven't looked it up yet.. But since I've been warned I'm afraid to now... I'll probably run across them as I read all the older posts. :)
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There's also no refund on the wasted hours of your life.
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Yo mama :focus: yo mama is so poor she uses deoderant as airfreshner
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There's also no refund on the wasted hours of your life.
lol, My life is full of wasted hours, some parts more than others. :) Why not waste a few more, if anything I'll probably just read a few of that persons posts then skip the rest of them. :) I do that occasionally. :)
Lets not forget I'm also adding someone to the list of ignoring posts, his name begins with a T and ends with iger227.
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:focus: gosh
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There's also no refund on the wasted hours of your life.
lol, My life is full of wasted hours, some parts more than others. :) Why not waste a few more, if anything I'll probably just read a few of that persons posts then skip the rest of them. :) I do that occasionally. :)
Lets not forget I'm also adding someone to the list of ignoring posts, his name begins with a T and ends with iger227.
Hmm, gee, CP, whoever could you be referring to?? :roll:
tiger's momma is so desperate that she screws the family dog while tiger watches. *<:)
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There's also no refund on the wasted hours of your life.
lol, My life is full of wasted hours, some parts more than others. :) Why not waste a few more, if anything I'll probably just read a few of that persons posts then skip the rest of them. :) I do that occasionally. :)
Lets not forget I'm also adding someone to the list of ignoring posts, his name begins with a T and ends with iger227.
Hmm, gee, CP, whoever could you be referring to?? :roll:
tiger's momma is so desperate that she screws the family dog while tiger watches. *<:)
My mom is dead, i never knew her you piece of crap
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Don't start something you can't finish little boy. :wink:
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There's also no refund on the wasted hours of your life.
lol, My life is full of wasted hours, some parts more than others. :) Why not waste a few more, if anything I'll probably just read a few of that persons posts then skip the rest of them. :) I do that occasionally. :)
Lets not forget I'm also adding someone to the list of ignoring posts, his name begins with a T and ends with iger227.
Hmm, gee, CP, whoever could you be referring to?? :roll:
tiger's momma is so desperate that she screws the family dog while tiger watches. *<:)
My mom is dead, i never knew her you piece of crap
So many wonderful things I could do with that information... but I digress. Tiger227, I suggest you just cut your losses and leave. No one will accept you here because of your behavior.
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Please can we keep intended personal insults off the open forum.
Pms are the place for that IF you feel it is absolutely necessary.
:focus:
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Yo momma shoulda swallowed. :-D
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Off topic.
Look. I understand that tiger is annoying to most everyone here(cept maybe me).
But could ya ease up a little, He's just tryin to be friendly. And wasn't I the same when i first got here huh?
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Off topic.
Look. I understand that tiger is annoying to most everyone here(cept maybe me).
But could ya ease up a little, He's just tryin to be friendly. And wasn't I the same when i first got here huh?
No, I will not ease up and you know it, Raz. Also, who said you stopped being annoying? You just learned how to post stuff that was almost interesting, lol.
Now.... :focus:
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Yo mama, is so dumb, i saw her wlakin down the street talkin into an envelope, when i asked what she was doin, shee said, sendin voicemail :-D