Random Goth test by the Catholic Church

[Zak Roy Yoballa]

What... dirty and smelly?  

JK Mortica!

ZRY

[Morticia]

i looked through it....it almost perfectly describes me, except for the whole declaring to be a goth thing and the makeup. I AM NOT A GOTH.....and Morticia, Wiccans are like hippies.

I have to peacefully disagree.  If you're comparing religions, I found Wicca to be what I call "Junior Witchcraft".

Most of the hippies I knew were 'lost' Christians who eventually went back.  

The lifestyle in general may be have been similar, but there aren't many young 'back to the earth' people who are willing to live without electricity, water and refrigeration just to prove a point - that they can live off the land.  They're still out there, but I'm guessing most of them are my age and older.

~Morticia

[Sonnilion]

I'm using my powers of deduction....Sonni I think there may be a little angst in your reply....No no I'm sure of it.... you must be a teen goth!

Nobody listen to him, he'll scramble your brain with his goth-rays and satan-vibes  !

ZRY

lol!  one of my friends is a Goth Christian... His parents have the christain station on all the time and it is very hard not to slam my head against the radio to the tune everytime I need a car ride from them   but I dont not judge people by relgion or stupid stuff like that so I suck it up of course hes tried preaching me once but that only started a fight and he never tried again.

[Zak Roy Yoballa]

If it makes you fell any better, I've tried to listen to contemporary christian music and it makes me nauseous too.  Someday, when you are tired of being angry, not that you don't have a right to be, you'll look back at the friend and remember what he tried to do for you.  Hopefully you'll take his advice.  *thinks to self:  gee I hope his friend didn't advise him to kick the crap out of a stranger and eat his little finger and thumb! *

[Devious Viper]

Point the first... That list is attributed to St Mary's Church School. I can't find anything that substantiates that claim. Before everyone carries on saying what terrible people the Roman Catholics are (of which faith I am NOT a member, incidentally) you might consider that the list is actually a wind-up...  

EDITED TO ADD- Ok, found where this originated.
http://redmusic.com/goths/
Its meant to be a joke, guys!

Point the second.... I prefer this checklist -

You Might Be A Goth If:
You pay 6 bucks for cigarettes that match your outfit
You like to play dead in public
You wake up still drunk at 3 in the afternoon with anonymous black
lipstick on your face
The shade of facepowder you wear is called "Sheet Of Paper"
The Count was your favorite Sesame Street character as a child
You wear long, velvet coats in the middle of summer
You go to Denny's at 5 in the morning and think, "These are my people"
You think dead flowers are prettier than live ones
You refer to your age in mortal years
You buy $15 fishnets and rip them on purpose
Your combat boots cost more than it takes to feed a third world child
for two years
You've willingly undergone cosmetic dental surgery
You own 16 or more Cleopatra c.d.'s
You own even 1 Projekt c.d.
You can't decide whether Morticia Addams or Lily Munster is prettier,
then decide Wednesday blows them both away
You were disappointed to find out that "American Gothic" is a portrait
of two farmers
You think of the hearse as a "family car"
You own a glow-in-the-dark rosary that alternates between your neck and
the rearview mirror in your car
You fashion your eyeliner after a culture that's been dead over 2000
years
You have seen "Nightmare Before Christmas" more than seven times
Your purse is large, square and metal
You argue on whether Poppy Z. Brite or Anne Rice has the more realistic
view on vampires
You and your friends take lengthy drives to visit non-local graveyards
You spell Vampire either Vampyre or Vamphyre
Your boyfriend complains that his ribs just don't stick out the way
they used to
Your girlfriend complains that you look better in her black, velvet
skirt than she does
You refer to others as "The Normals"
You are happy when no one has ever heard of your favorite band
Christians accost you with pamphlets on the street frequently
You accost Christians with pamphlets on the street
You and your boyfriend fight over who gets to wear the fangs
This list made you depressed


 

~ Viper ~

PS If that "Christian" checklist proved anything, its that a lot of "goths" and others a) have no sense of humour b)can't distinguish a parody from reality and c)are far too sensitive! "Ooh, those horrid Christians, they say I need mental health care just because I'm a suicidal dweeb!!"  

[alastor moon]

Point the first... That list is attributed to St Mary's Church School. I can't find anything that substantiates that claim. Before everyone carries on saying what terrible people the Roman Catholics are (of which faith I am NOT a member, incidentally) you might consider that the list is actually a wind-up...  

EDITED TO ADD- Ok, found where this originated.
http://redmusic.com/goths/
Its meant to be a joke, guys!

Point the second.... I prefer this checklist -

You Might Be A Goth If:
You pay 6 bucks for cigarettes that match your outfit
You like to play dead in public
You wake up still drunk at 3 in the afternoon with anonymous black
lipstick on your face
The shade of facepowder you wear is called "Sheet Of Paper"
The Count was your favorite Sesame Street character as a child
You wear long, velvet coats in the middle of summer
You go to Denny's at 5 in the morning and think, "These are my people"
You think dead flowers are prettier than live ones
You refer to your age in mortal years
You buy $15 fishnets and rip them on purpose
Your combat boots cost more than it takes to feed a third world child
for two years
You've willingly undergone cosmetic dental surgery
You own 16 or more Cleopatra c.d.'s
You own even 1 Projekt c.d.
You can't decide whether Morticia Addams or Lily Munster is prettier,
then decide Wednesday blows them both away
You were disappointed to find out that "American Gothic" is a portrait
of two farmers
You think of the hearse as a "family car"
You own a glow-in-the-dark rosary that alternates between your neck and
the rearview mirror in your car
You fashion your eyeliner after a culture that's been dead over 2000
years
You have seen "Nightmare Before Christmas" more than seven times
Your purse is large, square and metal
You argue on whether Poppy Z. Brite or Anne Rice has the more realistic
view on vampires
You and your friends take lengthy drives to visit non-local graveyards
You spell Vampire either Vampyre or Vamphyre
Your boyfriend complains that his ribs just don't stick out the way
they used to
Your girlfriend complains that you look better in her black, velvet
skirt than she does
You refer to others as "The Normals"
You are happy when no one has ever heard of your favorite band
Christians accost you with pamphlets on the street frequently
You accost Christians with pamphlets on the street
You and your boyfriend fight over who gets to wear the fangs
This list made you depressed


 

~ Viper ~

PS If that "Christian" checklist proved anything, its that a lot of "goths" and others a) have no sense of humour b)can't distinguish a parody from reality and c)are far too sensitive! "Ooh, those horrid Christians, they say I need mental health care just because I'm a suicidal dweeb!!"  

i like your checklist better.....um....almost all fit me..... especially the nonlocal cemetary drives.

[Sonnilion]

Nightmare Before Christmas is cool!

[Devious Viper]

Nightmare Before Christmas is cool!

 
Agreed!!

[Devious Viper]

(er...sorry, I bumped this up a bit, we were getting off-topic )

Point the first... That Gothic checklist is attributed to St Mary's Church School. I can't find anything that substantiates that claim. Before everyone carries on saying what terrible people the Roman Catholics are (of which faith I am NOT a member, incidentally) you might consider that the list is actually a wind-up...  

EDITED TO ADD- Ok, found where it originated.
LINK TO PARODY WEBSITE
Its meant to be a joke, guys!

Point the second.... I prefer this checklist -

You Might Be A Goth If:
You pay 6 bucks for cigarettes that match your outfit
You like to play dead in public
You wake up still drunk at 3 in the afternoon with anonymous black
lipstick on your face
The shade of facepowder you wear is called "Sheet Of Paper"
The Count was your favorite Sesame Street character as a child
You wear long, velvet coats in the middle of summer
You go to Denny's at 5 in the morning and think, "These are my people"
You think dead flowers are prettier than live ones
You refer to your age in mortal years
You buy $15 fishnets and rip them on purpose
Your combat boots cost more than it takes to feed a third world child
for two years
You've willingly undergone cosmetic dental surgery
You own 16 or more Cleopatra c.d.'s
You own even 1 Projekt c.d.
You can't decide whether Morticia Addams or Lily Munster is prettier,
then decide Wednesday blows them both away
You were disappointed to find out that "American Gothic" is a portrait
of two farmers
You think of the hearse as a "family car"
You own a glow-in-the-dark rosary that alternates between your neck and
the rearview mirror in your car
You fashion your eyeliner after a culture that's been dead over 2000
years
You have seen "Nightmare Before Christmas" more than seven times
Your purse is large, square and metal
You argue on whether Poppy Z. Brite or Anne Rice has the more realistic
view on vampires
You and your friends take lengthy drives to visit non-local graveyards
You spell Vampire either Vampyre or Vamphyre
Your boyfriend complains that his ribs just don't stick out the way
they used to
Your girlfriend complains that you look better in her black, velvet
skirt than she does
You refer to others as "The Normals"
You are happy when no one has ever heard of your favorite band
Christians accost you with pamphlets on the street frequently
You accost Christians with pamphlets on the street
You and your boyfriend fight over who gets to wear the fangs
This list made you depressed


   

~ Viper ~

PS If that "Christian" checklist proved anything, its that a lot of "goths" and others a) have no sense of humour b) can't distinguish a parody from reality and c) are far too sensitive! "Ooh, those horrid Christians, they say I need mental health care just because I'm a suicidal dweeb!!"  

[Devious Viper]

Reading through the hoax list that started this thread off, I'm really disappointed that some of the original "Goth warning signs" didn't make it on to Satanic Stevie's post. There were some real gems, like...

*Kills people for fun.
*Stays up late at night and/or drinks blood.
*Forgets to do chores, possibly because of drug or alcohol abuse.
*Hears music when the only sound is noise, possibly because of drug or    alcohol abuse.
*Writes angry entries in a secret diary (you can usually find the diary easily if you search your child's room).
*Has paranoid fantasies (many GOTHS accuse their parents of spying on them).
*Pursues dangerous cult religions such as WICCA, SATANISM, HINDUISM and BUDDHISM.
*Uses the blood of Christian babies to inscribe pentagrams or other symbols on churches and schools.
*Smokes clove cigarettes.
*Leaves syringes or other drug paraphernalia around the house.
*Asks for locks of hair from casual acquaintances.
*Owns more than one cast-iron cauldron.

 

I do feel sorry for the folks at ST MARYS CHURCH who received such hostility for being the "source" of this checklist. Shame   on whoever did that

~ Viper ~

[Zak Roy Yoballa]

You think of the hearse as a "family car"

Had one when I was a teen!  They're great!  There is a pic of it on my website.  Loads of fun and the strange looks you get are to....DIE for!  

ZRY (that pun always...kills me!)

[Zak Roy Yoballa]

With a little imagination, glue and various odds and ends you can turn the inside into something to talk about, even if it is a station wagon.  I the back of the hearse I put four big blue bean bag chairs for passengers to ride on.  It was great...until I had to stop!  I was pulled over several times just for looking suspicious.  The cops were normally cool and I was never ticketed in it.  I think they were more curious than anything else.


ZRY