Author Topic: You Know You're a Horror Movie Geek if You:  (Read 1954 times)

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You Know You're a Horror Movie Geek if You:
« on: January 15, 2009, 01:47:13 AM »
You Know You're a Horror Movie Geek if You:

- believe the gore the merrier.

- have ever been mistaken for a Satanist.

- root for the mutant family in "The Hills Have Eyes."

- laugh during "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre."

- cry while watching "It's Alive."

- believe Rob Zombie is a great director.

- prefer slow, shambling zombies over the fast ones.

- hate CGI.

- refer to classic films as the original so people don't think you're talking about the remake.

- detest the rating "PG-13."

- have seen any of the movies Peter Jackson directed before "Lord of the Rings."

- hope that Steven Spielberg stops with the Oscar contenders and returns to stuff like "Jaws."

- die inside every time another remake is announced.

- can't get enough of "The Stuff."

- go out of your way to watch anything that might have Bruce Campbell in it.

- see any movie based on Stephen King even though you know it's going to suck.

- drooled when "Masters of Horror" was announced.

- argue that Tobe Hooper, not Steven Spielberg, directed "Poltergeist."

- have seen Christopher Lee in a drag.

- watch "From Dusk till Dawn" for Tom Savini instead of George Clooney.

- try to get people to admit that "The Silence of the Lambs" and "Seven" are horror flicks.

- randomly say "BRAINS!"

- get pissed when all channels play Christmas movies instead of scary movies on Halloween.

- believe that "Van Helsing" ruined the classic monsters.

- ever yelled for any reason at the screen "Just Kill that lady!"

- think baby Selwyn is cute.

- know that "28 Days Later" was not the first movie to have running zombies.

- want your enemies' heads to pop like in "Scanners."

- wanted Bill Moseley to get an Oscar nomination for playing Otis in "The Devil's Rejects."

- threaten to suck people's brains dry.

- can explain Chucky's (of the Rugrats) fear of the guy on the oatmeal box.

- know that Chucky's (the doll) real name is Charles Lee Ray.

- import dvd's from Japan.

- read Fangoria.

- hope the makers "Alien vs. Predator" burn in hell for ruining two of your favorite monsters in one movie.

- warn people about hardshell peppercorns.

- know all the slashers and their backstories.

- refer to shotguns as "boomsticks."

- ever wanted to cut off your hand and replace it with a chainsaw

- expand your horizons by watching a David Cronenberg movie.

- have read "The Zombie Survival Guide" and know what to do if the undead should rise.

- run out of the room if someone starts saying Candyman into the mirror.

- believe all the rich people in the world are really aliens that you can only see when you wear special sunglasses.

- can actually understand the plot of "Phantasm."

- know that "Prince of Darkness" beat out "The Davinci Code."

- warn real estate developers about building on Indian burial ground.

- wonder why George Romero couldn't have directed "Resident Evil" the movie.

- are aware that "Re-Animator" provided the world's first visual pun.

- are on the lookout for penis Miller in a Joe Dante movie.

- know that Klopek is not a Slavic name.

- realize that a tire is not a good hiding spot from a graboid.

- pay to get in and pray to get out.

- will always remember Johnny Depp as the guy who was vomited up in a geyser of guts by Freddy Kruger.

- made nitrous oxide your drug of choice after watching "Blue Velvet."

- have either "The Dead Zone" or "Sleepy Hollow" as your favorite Cristopher Walken movie.

- still can't accept that James Cameron directed "Titanic."

- are aware "The Exorcist" has sequels and not just prequels.

- heard of "I am Legend" before it was a Will Smith movie.

- know what KNB stands for.

- have the right to remain silent... forever.

- must resist the urge to introduce yourself with "Name's Ash. Housewares."

- stick to explored caves because of "The Descent."

- appreciate life so as not to get kidnapped by Jigsaw.

-ever had people look at you funny when you tell them what your favorite movies are.

-debate bipedal versus four-legged werewolves.

-ever asked for a Nixon pardon.

-hope for a zombie apocalypse so you can use what you learned from "The Zombie Survival Guide."

-can explain all the rules of all the vampire movies you've ever seen.

-believe Bruce Campbell does Elvis better than Elvis.

-get angry when someone says they don't like scary movies, but they go see one when everyone's talking about it.

-fondly remember the Video Nasties.

-believe Mary Whitehouse was a cross between Sarah Palin and the "Where's the Beef?" lady.

-lecture people about why the infected from "28 Days Later" are not zombies.

- don't require any assistance understanding the above.


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Re: You Know You're a Horror Movie Geek if You:
« Reply #1 on: March 21, 2010, 01:29:28 AM »
Sequel to what you said?
In Pandora's box came out evil, illness, and death which mankind did not know of until then. And at the bottom of the box was hope for mankind.
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Re: You Know You're a Horror Movie Geek if You:
« Reply #2 on: June 22, 2010, 04:37:42 PM »
Couple of points.

Can my fave Peter Jackson movie before Lord of the (gags) Rings be Meet the Feebles.

I do love the runners as opposed to the slouchers when it comes to zombies. I have had horrible nightmares about zombies and theyu always run.

I love CGI when used right.

Other than that great list.

A few I would add is:

Refuse to see quarantine as it seems pointless unless you are illiterate.

Hate that now a vampire movie is almost exclusivly targeted at the same audiences that watch soap operas.

Think that Dead Set might possibly be the greatest T.V. show ever.
I forgot to spend some time thinking of a cool signature.

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Re: You Know You're a Horror Movie Geek if You:
« Reply #3 on: June 23, 2010, 11:44:28 AM »
lol alright so I am a horror movie geek. So what? At least I know what will happen when bad horrible things start coming around lol.
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Re: You Know You're a Horror Movie Geek if You:
« Reply #4 on: July 02, 2010, 07:31:42 PM »
You know you're a horror movie geek if you've seen the same horror movie 20 times and still yell at the girl that the monster is right behind her or do a face palm when the people go into dark woods, rooms, any dark place in general.
Suicide girl takes her last breath, consumed by darkness and by death. And so it is the tragic end, of the wicked girl with the twisted grin.