Monstrous
The Animal Within => Monstrous Animals => Topic started by: TeteoInan on October 11, 2011, 08:04:32 AM
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One Flaw Away
"The fascinating thing about evolution is how it finds infinite ways for creatures to be badass. Some can rip every other species in their area to shreds, some are masters of camouflage, some just breed so fast you can't eat them all. But equally amazing is how creatures find a way to survive and thrive even with laughable and obvious design defects."
#7. Mayflies Have No Mouths
#6. Octopuses Die After Sex
#5. The Portuguese Man-of-War Can't Swim
#4. Tarsiers Can't Walk
#3. The Shoebill Sucks at Flying
#2. Slavemaker Ants Suck at Everything
#1. Scorpions Glow in the Dark
http://www.cracked.com/article_19469_7-animals-that-are-one-flaw-away-from-taking-over-world.html (http://www.cracked.com/article_19469_7-animals-that-are-one-flaw-away-from-taking-over-world.html)
They're Trying!
"Everyone knows nature is a symposium of terrifying freaks. Mostly we just take it in stride, because most of the really horrifying ones are rare and usually in Australia.
Sometimes, however, nature gets its s**t organized, and what was once a comfortingly rare freakshow then becomes an army at your doorstep. Here are but a few of the natural forces waging war on humanity en masse."
#5. Argentine Ants Are Everywhere--and We Mean Everywhere
#4. The Jellyfish are Occupying Japan
#3. The Mountain Pine Beetles are Eating All the Trees
#2. Dolphins are Massing Their Troops for... Something
#1. Kudzu Vines will Strangle All of Us in Our Sleep
http://www.cracked.com/article/82_5-species-that-seem-to-be-trying-to-take-over-earth/ (http://www.cracked.com/article/82_5-species-that-seem-to-be-trying-to-take-over-earth/)
Silly Humans
"The upward growth of mankind has been marked by the extinction of countless other species that got in our way, from the mammoths were were too tasty for their own good, to all the animals dumb enough to live where supertankers ply. It's natural selection!
But then, there are those species that, to any rational person, are being wiped out for no good reason at all. These are just some of the creatures who we're rapidly slaughtering for the pure hell of it."
#6. Guajon: The Frog Too Horrifying To Live
#5. The Manus Island Tree Snail Makes Great Earrings
#4. Elfin Tree Fern: Imprisoned In Your Living Room
#3. The Asian Rhinoceros Makes a Great Placebo
#2. Tigers Are the Swiss Army Knives of Chinese Wildlife
#1. Mountain Gorillas Make Awesome Souvenirs
http://www.cracked.com/article_17504_6-species-weve-nearly-killed-off-for-retarded-reasons.html#ixzz1aUsrkm4b (http://www.cracked.com/article_17504_6-species-weve-nearly-killed-off-for-retarded-reasons.html#ixzz1aUsrkm4b)
Thought We Got Rid of You
"Not every endangered species is a breed of particularly fluffy kitten that's been driven to death by a nasty capitalist SUV factory. Some are endangered in the same way that smallpox is endangered: because they should be, dammit.
Here are six endangered species that, in our opinion, aren't endangered enough."
#6. Goliath Bird Eating Spider
#5. Ravoux's Slavemaker Ant
#4. Ganges Shark
#3. Corpse Flower
#2. Red-Headed Vulture
#1. Panda
http://www.cracked.com/article_16054_6-endangered-species-that-arent-endangered-enough.html (http://www.cracked.com/article_16054_6-endangered-species-that-arent-endangered-enough.html)
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#6. Goliath Bird Eating Spider
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Might sound bad but I agree with the spider.
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Wrong wrong wrong.
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Wrong wrong wrong.
:? I'm confused... what's wrong? Like, info or... is this your opinion? Or did I miss something else entirely?
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There is incorrect info but more because I don't have much of a sense of humor when it comes to extinction.
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Aha.
Well, I didn't mean to offend anyone with posting it. :|
I enjoyed "One Flaw Away" and "They're Trying", and it's the reason I made the topic.
The other two posts are the otherside of things, and were related articles so I thought I'd post them, too.
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And if it was me that offended you, I'm not apoligizing, never liked spiders to begin with, especially the big ones, and for the last few days I've been pissed off. But usually I'd agree with you, even with those things.
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The panda :-D That was funny as hell. I was thinking Why the panda? It dosnt really do anything. :-D
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That's the one that got me, too. I'm still confused as to why they're considered "Not endangered Enough" though.
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No offense taken, I was in such a foul mood that day I didn't have any sense of humor. I can understand the spider thing, I feel the same way about jellyfish & as far as I am concerned every single one could vanish & it would be a better world . As for "not endangered enough" maybe the writer of the article has some weird panda phobia? Scratch that, apparently it isn't that weird, it's a form of Melissophobia which is the fear of bears. Or maybe he has an even weirder bamboo fetish & doesn't want the competition?
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Bamboo fetish? Omg its a winner!!! *<:) *<:) *<:)
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it's a form of Melissophobia which is the fear of bears. Or maybe he has an even weirder bamboo fetish & doesn't want the competition?
Thanks for that. I couldn't remember it or find it for some reason... My Mother and I were talking about Phobias that didn't make sense to have it listed as something specific. Being afraid of things that are bigger than you and can eat your face for instance, is something everyone should have, and shouldn't be considered abnormal in the least.
aaaand Bamboo fetish is possible, I guess. *<:) Maybe he is having Pica cravings?
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All I can say is it reminds me of a joke dealing with Pandas..
A panda walks into a bar and orders food. After the panda eats the food he pulls out a gun and shoots everybody except the bar tender.
Bartender: Panda what the crap?!
Panda pulls out dictionary and points to definition
-Panda: Eats chutes and leafs......
But agreed on the whole spider thing ....and that being afraid of things that can rip your face off should be considered a rational fear.
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Funny, but even as almost being killed by a spider as a little child, I still dont fear them. Respect, sure. But no phobia there. Snakes though... ermm, i can look at them, but dont ask of me to touch any. Seriously.
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I like Panda bears. *<:)
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I have a gained a very healthy respect for my personal safety involving critters, so I handle them with care, and depending on what they are, extreme caution.
When it comes to spiders, my form of care and caution varies from a nice and slow approach to get it out of my house, to shrieking and backing the eff away from it as fast as possible. :-D
http://www.monstrous.com/forum/index.php?topic=12980.0 (http://www.monstrous.com/forum/index.php?topic=12980.0)
"Mankind likes to think it's pretty awesome. If you're like me, then you spend at least four hours a week mocking monkeys for their lack of opposable thumbs. Or taunting tigers for not inventing the internet. Occasionally though, animals get the upper hand, like when the monkey takes your car keys, or when the tiger takes your upper hand. Or, as in the examples below, when animals pool their vastly superior numbers and launch a vengeful invasion against the humans."
6. Christmas Island Crabs
5. Starlings
4. Cicadas ( I hate these bastages... ) "If you live in West Virginia, then right now, under your feet, billions of tiny brown creatures are lying in wait for the year 2012, when, as per the Mayan calendar, they will rise up en masse, crawl out of the soil, and take over the state."
3. Mormon Crickets
2. Kangaroos
1. Australian Mice
Read the whole thing here: http://www.spike.com/articles/fv334l/when-animals-invade-the-six-species-that-are-trying-to-take-over-the-world?page=1 (http://www.spike.com/articles/fv334l/when-animals-invade-the-six-species-that-are-trying-to-take-over-the-world?page=1)
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Woohoo go spiders.